Can I get a gaybashers perspective? You Piece of Sh*t?

Original Post 2/27/2009 – redated

I promise this will be the last “observation” post for a little bit and will get back to the business stuff tomorrow.  I was actually a few pages into my new Lifecycle series article, but something came up that pissed me off, and I wanted to try to motivate some people to action. 

I need somebody to help me understand.  Are we still collectively that homophobic, racist, and stupid?

 If you don’t want to read the article, please at least go here and lend your support.

Here is the background 

I live in Gainesville, FL. Home to UF, the National Champion Florida Gators, and hundreds of thousands of college students.  It just came to my attention that a proposition called Charter Amendment 1 has received enough petition signatures to be eligible for a vote in the next general elections. 

It basically says that you can deny service, employment, admittance, and rental to someone based on sexual orientation.  


I won’t get into how they would confirm this fact, but it does kind of make you think of a modern-day witch hunt, don’t it?   (I accuse you Richard Gere of being gay! No apartment rental for you or your gerbil!) 

I would take it as a fluke, but this amendment has gotten a LOT of signatures. It was apparently under the radar since I am one of many who have never heard of it, but signatures it did get nonetheless.


What could possibly justify this? 

How does a reasonably intelligent person living in 2009 justify this to themselves?  I thought we were past the point of arbitrarily hating people.  Apparently not. 

I just need someone to explain to me how someone’s sexual orientation has anything to do with anything. That includes their worthiness to rent a house or make you dinner at TGI Fridays.  I don’t think it makes them more or less of a person, more or less responsible, more or less trustworthy, more or less likely to be a criminal – more or less anything. It just is.  If they are an asshole, they are just an asshole – not a gay asshole.  If they are a genius, they are just a genius – not a gay genius.  Same thing applies if you are black, pray to Vishnu, or whatever. A good person is a good person. An idiot is an idiot. 


Is it the religious angle?

I’ve heard it before. God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.  How very clever. 

But again, what does that have to do with anything?  I would hope you are intelligent enough to reach the conclusion that we don’t all pray to the same God, or may not pray to any God at all. 

And believe it or not, not all religions approve and condemn the same behaviors –  I know. Gasp.  I’m clearly not an expert on religion, but I’m guessing the same thing that would get you into heaven as a Catholic might just land you in hell if Islam is right, or reincarnate you as a doorknob if the Buddhists turn out to be correct. 

If your religion says don’t be gay. And you value your religion…then don’t be gay.  That’s entirely your own business. Not mine.

But to let you know, my religion says it’s ok to be gay, but you can’t be a bigoted idiot.  So be aware, that I am planning on denying you any civil rights because you are an idiot.  I don’t want to have to, and I don’t have a problem with you personally, but my religion says so.


Is it just hate of different things? 

Us Americans sure love to hate things. Especially if it is different from our closed-minded world view. First we hated the blacks, then the Japanese, then the Russians, then the gays. (and about 9 million things in between there) The racism seems to have gotten a little bit better (or at least enough to elect a black president) but I am wondering if we have just moved on to hating a flavor of the week versus actually getting rid of hating in general.


Haters, I’ve been there…I understand. I don’t agree, but I understand. 

I grew up in a pretty small town that was largely blue-collar. My wife’s town was even smaller.  It was Meathead and redneck heaven.  LOTS of hate going on there.  Her town was so inbred that there never was a black person in her school until she was a senior. My grandmother told “nigger” jokes until the day she died, and never questioned if it was right. As you can imagine, there was lots of race bashing and beating up the “smart” kids who managed to get through school without repeating a grade. In general, the knuckle-draggers ruled the town.  God forbid anyone “come out” in school. It never happened at my school.  But I was the first boy in my school to get an earring, and was labeled as a fag for about a year… Until the fad caught on, and approximately 90% of the boys had one (left ear only, right was still arbitrarily gay). 

I always intrinsically knew it was retarded but really had no frame of reference to compare it to. It was small town America. 

Then I went away to a big college and eventually went on to work in Boston and New York. Back then, internet firms were all small start-ups, and usually in the textile or art districts of the cities.  As you can imagine, it was a crash course in gay culture. 

My experience taught me that a few things:

  1. Gay guys are really are no different that straight guys.  They still love porn, beer, and fart jokes.
  2. There really is no thing as gaydar.  For every 1 person that you “know” is gay, there are 3 others that you would never suspect. I know from personal experience.  Being totally cool with gay people sometimes leads to some uncomfortable, if flattering, conversations…lol.
  3. If I were gay I would be considered a “bear” and a “daddy.” Not relevant, but I always thought it was funny.
  4. Other than the occasional “super out*” person who is not only gay and proud, but must share the fact with everybody, for most gay folks, it’s just never a topic of conversation. It never comes up in normal interactions, and in almost every case you completely forget about it.   

*As a side note I have worked with exactly 2 “super out” people.  Both were told to tone it down or look for another job, and I agree.  You’re sexuality should not be thrown in people faces, straight or gay.  It’s cool for water-cooler talk, but leave the daisy dukes in the closet for board meetings. (Yes I would LOVE to see the bosses hot secretary in a slutty outfit, but it’s no more appropriate for them than it is for Timmy the supertwink)  

The point is, a lot of small town folks never have an opportunity to actually meet, or more importantly, have an intelligent conversation with someone who is different.  To them, gays, blacks, or anyone different is reduced to the stereotype caricature.  And while those stereotypes are usually based in SOME element of truth, they never paint the entire picture. 

I’m not defending your actions, I knew it was wrong when I was 12 years old.  But until I had the experience of moving beyond that small town mindset, and coming to the conclusion that I liked gay people enough that I didn’t care if people though I was gay myself, that I was able to confront the idiocy that exists. 


My Official Stance… 

So I ask you to join me in saying to the world.  I’m gay and I’m proud.  I’m black and I’m proud.   Don’t you dare treat me any different because I am white, straight, and “culturally acceptable.”  

If you are going to take away their rights, then you better take away MY rights too.  

Just be warned: If you try, then I’m gonna round up all my gay, black, or agnostic brothers and sisters and stuff my size 11 Jimmy Choo stiletto right up your ass.



First, a realistic way to vote if you are lazy like me

Just go to the site or call and request an absentee ballot. If they ask just say you are going to be away on business or vacation that day, but really want to vote. They will send you all the stuff, and you can just fill out the form in your underwear at home and mail in. I don’t know about you, but I would rather pay $.42 cents for a stamp than find out where my voting section is and stand in line for an hour.


Please join the fight against Amendment 1 

Here is the link to the site: 

When to Vote:

Date: Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Time: 7:00am – 7:00pm
Location: Your Polling Place
City/Town: Gainesville, FL
Phone: 3523273359



EARLY VOTING (March 16-21):

Supervisor of Elections Office
County Administration Building
12 SE 1st Street, Gainesville, FL

( More info here: )


Pd. Pol. Adv. Paid for by Equality Is Gainesville’s Business, PO Box 40, Gainesville FL 32602

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5 Comments + Add Comment

  • This is seriously mind-boggling. At 4 a.m. I could really just go on and on and on (because I REALLY get mental diarrhea this late/early). For anyone that wants to stand on the “this country was found ‘Under God'” platform… to them I gotta ask, “Hey, wasn’t this country found under the main idea of the separation of Church and State? Didn’t this … Read Morewhole “America” thing start as a result of escaping persecution? Hm? Got a little bit of BS there? A little backwards thinking? Got a case of wanting your cake and to eat it, too? Hm? (This entire thought is in the taunting voice of Stewie Griffen when he’s riding Brian about his novel… friggin’ insomnia).

    I digress.

    Further, I invite ANYONE on my friends list that thinks this amendment is appropriate in any shape or form to PLEASE delete me. Because your brain is broke. I mean buh-ROKE. If you think discrimination like this is okay, please feel free to get a one-way visa to the Middle East where thinking like yours is acceptable.

  • On the picture…I haven’t read the entire Bible, so please forgive me if I’m wrong: I don’t recall seeing the word “fag” in the Bible. Like I said, I could be wrong. I wonder if the guy next to the sign knows that God also “hates” for people to pass judgement and that He tells us to LOVE our neighbor. Jesus tells us not to judge others; Matthew… Read More 7:1-2: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and the measures you use, it will be measured to you.” (NIV) I’d like to ask this man if he realizes that Jesus walked, slept and ate with sinners!

    I could go on, but…now I’m pissed! (sorry)

  • Interesting. 350 reads in a few hours and only comments from girls 🙂 I was kinda hoping to stir up some of the other straight males out there to step up and say its wrong too.

    Oh well. Upon reflection, a business/humor blog is probably not the right venue anyway…and it was a bit preachy…sorry for that.

    Ok. Back to the business from now on.

  • Hey Naga. You want a straight male perspective? I got it.

    I won’t begrudge anyone their religious views. I may secretly mock them for it, but in a way, I am envious of anyone with TRUE faith. I possess very little myself, and most of what I do stock, I place in humanity. Even when I see crap like this, I have to believe that as self aware, intelligent (more or less) beings, we can come together for our own betterment eventually. If I’m choking and need help, and I have to choose between the guy standing next to me or some invisible dude that I have never seen…I’ll take the guy standing next to me.

    All that said, if that dude happens to be gay, I could care less. And I’m betting that Mr. “God hates fags” here would feel the same way. He might play it off with his ignorant friends later about getting the Heimlich and “mouth to mouth” from some fag, but I’d bet everything that I am, that he would be thankful to his equally ignorant,fag hating god that the fag was there and save his worthless hide.

    I was staying at a friend of mine’s in Sacramento during the election last year. He was really concerned about Prop 8. He desired to married at some point in his life and, as a gay man, Prop 8 would only make that harder. I chided him for being foolosh. I told hima, and genuinely thought, that that was NO F”N WAY that Prop 8 would pass in California. NO WAY!! When we went to bed, the matter was still undecided. When I woke before him and saw that it had indeed passed, it truly broke my heart. I was going to have to tell my friend that the people of California didn’t think enough of him to “allow” him to get married. Now, I’ll be the first to question the institution of marriage in general. Having participated in it myself once, I am not eager to give it another go. However, as long as it exists, fags should be able to get it too. Let them regret their poor judgment as much as “50% divorce rate for first marriage” straight folks. You really want to defend the “institution” of marriage with the ridiculously terrible numbers that are the divorce rates in this country?!?!I will slap you in the face…with logic. Of course, that would fall on deaf ears because there is no logic in topics like this. No true thought process. Certainly no critical thinking. This is all about fear and what someone else told you to feel. And one day, decades down the road, this country will look back on this era with the same shame that we do around slavery and the segregation of black folks. I just hope we can see it for what it is and not find another group to irrationally afraid of.

  • And, for the record, the guy in the picture and his god may hate fags, but Romans 9:13 doesn’t have anything to do with homosexuality. Maybe he and his god were confused with Romans 1:26-27.

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